Henry VI Part III

What If Shakespeare…were a DENTIST?

Tooth Clip Art Welcome, young man (1). What! sigh for the toothache? Where is but a humour or a worm (2). Come, come, and sit you down (3). For there was never yet philosopher that could endure the toothache patiently (4).

Open your mouth (5). O horror, horror, horror (6)! Thou odouriferous stench! sound rottenness (7)! He lives upon mouldy stew’d prunes and dried cakes (8).

Give me that mattock and the wrenching iron (9).  [Strange and several noises of roaring, shrieking, howling, jingling chains, and more diversity of sounds, all horrible (10). Strange screams of death (11).] Be calm, be calm (12)!

The long day’s task is done (13); teeth as white as whale’s bone (14)! I will fetch you a tooth-picker now (15). Take leave until we meet again (16). Till then fair hope must hinder life’s decay (17).

1) As You Like It, V.iv, 256

2) Much Ado About Nothing, III.ii, 1223-4

3) Hamlet, III.iv, 2404)

4) Much Ado About Nothing, V.i, 2103-4

5) The Tempest, II.ii, 1171

6) Macbeth, II.iii, 835

7) King John, III.iv, 1410

8) Henry IV, Part II, II.iv, 1403

9) Romeo and Juliet, V.iii, 2959

10) The Tempest, V.i, 2296-98

11) Macbeth, II.iii, 825

12) Coriolanus, III.i, 1774

13) Antony and Cleopatra, IV.xiv, 3021

14) Love’s Labour’s Lost, V.ii, 2249-50

15) Much Ado About Nothing, II.i, 647

16) Henry VI, Part III, II.iii, 1070

17) Henry VI, Part III, IV.iv, 2258

Shakespeare re-arranged by Lisa

Image: http://www.clker.com/clipart-tooth.html

What if Shakespeare…were a WEATHER FORECASTER?

For Toronto, Ontario, Canada – June 11-17th

(Reasonably accurate, though, I wouldn’t bet your best jumper on it)

MONDAY:  Now is the winter of our discontent / Made glorious summer by this sun (1).  But, in the midst of this bright-shining day, / I spy a black, suspicious, threatening cloud, / That will encounter with our glorious sun (2).  So foul a sky clears not without a storm (3).  It will be rain to-night (4).  Such sheets of fire, such bursts of horrid thunder,/ Such groans of roaring wind and rain (5).  High 28.

TUESDAY:  A glooming peace this morning with it brings; / The sun, for sorrow, will not show his head (6).  Another storm brewing; I hear it sing i’ the wind: yond same black cloud, yond huge one, looks like a foul bombard that would shed his liquor (7).  Small showers last long, but sudden storms are short (8).  High 25.

WEDNESDAY:  The sun, / Who doth permit the base contagious clouds / To smother up his beauty from the world, / …please again to be himself (9)!  High 22.

THURSDAY:   The grey-eyed morn smiles on the frowning night, / Chequering the eastern clouds with streaks of light… / …the sun advance his burning eye / The day to cheer and night’s dank dew to dry (10).  High 21.

THE WEEKEND – FRIDAY, SATURDAY, SUNDAY:  Three glorious suns, each one a perfect sun; / Not separated with racking clouds, / But sever’d in a pale clear-shining sky (11).  High 23, 26, and 29.

And so, farewell.  Fair weather after you!  (12)

Using TLNs (through line numbers):

1)  Richard III, I.i, 1-2

2)  Henry VI, Part III; V.iii, 2777-2779

3)  King John, V.ii, 1833

4)  Macbeth, III.ii, 1257

5)  King Lear, III.ii, 1718-1719

6)  Romeo & Juliet, V.iii, 3280-3281

7)  The Tempest, II.ii, 1101-1104

8)  Richard II, II.ii, 713

9)  Henry IV, Part I; I.ii; 297-300

10)  Romeo & Juliet, II.iii, 1055-1056 and 1059-1060

11)  Henry VI, Part III; II.i; 651-653

12)  Loves Labour Lost, I.ii, 439-440