What if Shakespeare…were STUCK IN TRAFFIC?

The two hours traffic of our stage: (1)

Like captives bound to a triumphant car – / What! shall we curse the planets of mishap / That plotted thus..? (2) Traffic confound thee, if the gods will not! (3)

O illegitimate construction! I scorn that with my heels (4) – that same wicked bastard…that was begot of thought, conceiv’d of spleen, and born of madness! (5)  Under your hard construction must I sit (6) I’ the midst o’ the body, idle and unactive (7).

I am arrested in the street (8) creeping like snail / Unwillingly (9).  Beyond the bounds of patience (10) Men all in fire walk up and down (11), stand in narrow lanes / And beat [their] watch (12).  Sorrow snares relenting passengers (13).

The horn, the horn, the lusty horn / Is not a thing to laugh to scorn (14).

 

1)    Romeo & Juliet, Prologue

2)    Henry VI, I; 1.1

3)    Timon of Athens, 1.1

4)    Much Ado About Nothing, 3.4

5)    As You Like It, 4.1

6)    Twelfth Night, 3.1

7)    Coriolanus, 1.1

8)    Comedy of Errors, 4.1

9)    As You Like It, 2.7

10)  Henry IV, I; 1.3

11)  Julius Caesar, 1.3

12)  Richard II, 5.3

13)  Henry VI, II, 3.1

14)  As You Like It, 4.2

 

Shakespeare re-arranged by Laboni

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