What if Shakespeare…were an INVESTMENT BANKER?

(On the brink of the current financial crisis) 

There is some ill a-brewing towards my rest, / For I did dream of money-bags to-night (1).  I greatly fear my money is not safe (2).  Say ‘tis not so (3).

I pray you sir! (4). I am not in a sportive humour now: / Tell me, and dally not, where is the money? (5). I beseech thee (6), answer me / In what safe place have you bestow’d my money? (7).

There is a written scroll! I’ll read the writing (8).  Mine eyes deceive me (9) It is not so; for how can this be true (10).  This paper has undone me: ‘tis the account / Of all that world of wealth I have drawn together (11).

‘Tis gone, ‘tis gone, ‘tis gone (12), melted into air, into thin air (13).

Alack the day! (14). Time is a very bankrupt, and owes more than he’s worth to season (15).

What hath been cannot be (16). You can fool no more money out of me (17). From this day forth (18) – Neither a borrower nor a lender be (19).

1          The Merchant of Venice [II. v. 865-66]

2          The Comedy of Errors [I. ii 270]

3          Anthony and Cleopatra [II. v. 1138]

4          All’s Well That Ends Well [II. ii. 863]

5          The Comedy of Errors [I.ii.58-59]

6          Anthony and Cleopatra [I. ii. 139]

7          The Comedy of Errors [I.ii.77-78]

8          The Merchant of Venice [II. vii. 1052]

9          The Comedy of Errors [V. i. 1773]

10        Love’s Labour’s Lost [V. ii. 2349]

11        Henry VIII [III. ii. 95-96]

12        Romeo and Juliet [I. v. 642]

13        The Tempest [IV. i. 81]

14        Romeo and Juliet [III. ii. 1760]

15        The Comedy of Errors [IV.ii.58]

16        All’s Well That Ends Well [I. i. 28]

17        Twelfth Night [IV. i. 2227]

18        Julius Caesar [IV. iii. 2030]

19        Hamlet [III. ii. 2091]

Shakespeare re-arranged by Linda Nicoll

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